Making Lemonade out of Lemons in Lisbon

I started a new tradition with this trip. I was going to focus on the positive. Call it genetics, call it the world I was raised in, call it the impact of growing up with social media, call it a choice - whatever it is - my brain tends to live in a depressive state.

While I was in Glasgow, I received the unfortunate news that's essentially is a right of passage as an adult. My company restructured, some big clients had been lost, and I, along with most of my department, were being laid off.

Amongst many other reasons, the decision was made that I needed to move back to the United States. Up until this point, I had been playing a really stressful game called the "Schengen Shuffle". Finances were running low, and there wasn't an end in sight. That, in addition to I could only get a job in my industry in Italy if I spoke fluent Italian, it felt like it was the smart and right thing to do to go back to the United States. Luckily, this is where me being a crazy planner came in handy. I knew where I was going when I moved back to the United States. The only thing to really figure out was how to make money. And I know I will get there. But... how to make the best of the rug being pulled out from under me.

People kept saying I was handling the news and the big change too well. Where was the anger? Where were the tears? Well... we as a society have lived through a lot. Most of us, have come out the otherside and we are okay. So I know, this is a phase. It will pass. I will be okay. My pride took a hit, sure. And I knew there were going to be people in my life that thought you wasted all that time and money over there for nothing. But I also knew the people that had those opinions, totally missed the point and the gift of what I was doing. So what did their opinion matter anyway. During COVID, most people were in a panic and spent the entire time being miserable that they couldn't have what they used to. Somehow I was able to see this time will pass, so let's take advantage and enjoy it while I can. No one made better use of that pandemic time than me. And I look back on that time with actual fondness. Yes, I lost people that I loved and that time caused me to loose respect for people I had once cared about. But ultimately, I feel like I am a better person coming out of that pandemic than I did going into it.

So with this opportunity, I decided I'm going to do the same thing. I took my severance and I planned my dream trip. I'm applying for jobs and doing interviews, but my main focus for the next month is going to be checking every single thing off the bucket list. This is the time where I'm going to live as if I have no tomorrow. Because when I go back to the US, it's time to start being an adult and saving for adult things. Yech.

So my new tradition (yes Ashley let's get to the point), is I am going to text my mother, my grandmother and my godmother every day and send them photos and tell them my rose and my thorn for the day. All so I can acknowledge the negative thoughts I have and release them, and then focus on celebrating the good.

So...for this trip...

My thorn: There is an end date to my living in Europe.

My rose: Getting to see every single thing I've ever wanted to see and experience.